When the sun comes up, I have morals again. — Quoted

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“When the sun comes up, I have morals again.”

Elayne Boosler · Funny

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Elayne Boosler

Wouldn't it be great if you could only get AIDS by giving money to television preachers?

Money

Elayne Boosler

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.

Funny

Elayne Boosler

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me.

Funny

Elayne Boosler

Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?

Funny