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Larry David

23 quotes by this author.

Larry David

Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy.

Women
Larry David

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Women
Larry David

I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, because I can finally put an end to all those who questioned my motives for enlisting in the Army Reserve at the height of the Vietnam War.

War
Larry David

Religion doesn't play any part in my life in terms of how I live my life. But I don't think I've ever gone through a day in my life without hearing someone say the word 'Jew' or saying it myself.

Religion
Larry David

Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious.

Relationship
Larry David

I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.

Money
Larry David

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian.

Money
Larry David

The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.

Mom
Larry David

Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!

Home
Larry David

There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That scene would've been so much better if I had written it out.

Home
Larry David

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas.

Home
Larry David

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.

Future
Larry David

There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.

Funny
Larry David

You have to discover when you're inadequate to be funny and you don't know you're inadequate when you're a kid.

Funny
Larry David

I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny.

Funny
Larry David

If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.

Funny
Larry David

Once I know people know who I am, it gives me a lot of licence and freedom to behave in ways I wouldn't normally.

Freedom
Larry David

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

Freedom
Larry David

The lunch in a normal American restaurant is very problematic for me. I don't like to have hot food for lunch.

Food
Larry David

Sometimes I have these fantasies of just moving to a foreign country and coming back with a full head of hair. Or not even come back! Make a new life there with hair... Change my name, just see what happens.

Change
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