“I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.”
Tip: press → for another quote, C to copy, S to share.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.
Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it's been a pretty good day.
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.