Will Rogers

Liberty doesn't work as well in practice as it does in speeches.

The United States never lost a war or won a conference.

Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.

Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.

I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.

You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.

In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.

The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he's got.

The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.

I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.

Politics is applesauce.

There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.

If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.

The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.

Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.

If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.

Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.

A fool and his money are soon elected.