Peter De Vries

I write when I'm inspired, and I see to it that I'm inspired at nine o'clock every morning.

Who of us is mature enough for offspring before the offspring themselves arrive? The value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults.

The value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults.

The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but must live with a character.

The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance.

The murals in restaurants are on par with the food in museums.

Gluttony is an emotional escape, a sign something is eating us.

I was thinking that we all learn by experience, but some of us have to go to summer school.

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.

Murals in restaurants are on a par with the food in museums.

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds - they mature slowly.