“I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.”
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I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.
I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.
A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.